Fading Flames of Patriot

It is true that in today's world, its hard to make a honest & decent living. The honest & decent have no place in the realm of deceit, lies, dishonesty and agendas. It does send a piercing arrow to the ones that work hard everyday when they are defeated by those to flew above. But the challenge lies in holding true to one's principle and believe that our turn will come. One way or another.

Broken Wings

On broken wings I'm falling

And it won't be long

The skin on me is burning

By the fires of the sun

On skinned knees I'm bleeding

And it won't be long

I've got to find that meaning

I'll search for so long

Cry ourselves to sleep

We will sleep alone forever

Will you lay me down

In the same place with all I love

Mend the broken homes

Care for them they are our brothers

Save the fading light in our souls

In my opinion seeing is to know

What you give

Will always carry you

And who's to say

We won't survive it too

Aint Losing It Yet

Being under work stress is quite worrying. It causes one to talk cork and sometimes look delirious. Friends will give you the look as though you have lost your marbles. Yeps. Alot of shit happend man but all is under control (i'm not denying). I have been through worse though, there were times in the past where i was lost and questioned the meaning of life but faith changed me. At times or peril or troubles, you dont have to look far for inspiration as He is right there. Tough times are there for us to reflect on things and to stregthen our weaknesses. Our burden is no more than what we can handle. Believe it and keep the faith.

Get Rich or Die Trying...again

I live in a third world country where discimination is openly practiced and the country's economic riches are controlled by a few. Not only that, the goddam government is wiping off the decent wealth of its people by imposing unreasonable taxes on imported goods. Oh yeah, i dont live in Africa either.
Damnit man, if the government wants to save money then just remove the bloody fuel subsidies and make cars cheaper by abolishing the high taxes. Oh..they cant becoz bloody factory that aseembles cars called proton will be killed if that is done. Well, it aint gonna live long too i tell ya. With the sweeping wave of globalization comes the cleansing tides change. Actually, why am I ranting about this country, heck i wasnt even born here anyway. But the people around me are and thats the only reason why i continue to bitch instead of moving my bum back to where i came from far up north.

What drives me?

It seems vague these days for me. I used to have the fire within and the hunger for ambition but I dont seem to see it now. Its those questions you ask yourself now and again "what am I doing?". Are my ambitions dimmed? Has the burning fire gone cool? What drives me? I seek definition.

Immanent Demon Blues

Man, i hate working with retards. This is the problem when you are involved in government projects when there is a huge gap in mentality. On one end, we the private company would bust our ass to complete a project by giving full cooperation and autonomy to our partner but what you get as a result is a back stab and the blame for their own incapabilities and incapacity to solve problems. So what can you do? take all the blame and hope all ends well.
Professional issues aside, these days my inner demon is surfacing again. All this while i thought i have locked that side of me away but somehow time and again "he" started appearing. My darkside has returned and i need to find a way to seal it. Either that or harness the full power of my inner demon (i might not return normal if that happens) i'm in for a rough time.

The Valentine Posting

Yeps, its inevitable that this kinda crap will show up in my blog. Normal blogs will go and say how the day or night has been great or even how it sucked big time and shit. As for me, i'm joining the bandwagon but with a question "Whats the fuss all about?". Truth is i never had a chance to "celebrate" Valentines Day as all of my relationships somehow ended before Feb 14 and spared me from financial disaster. It may be novel when you are like in your teens and the gal in the tuition class seems hot but as you grow up, its just passe. Now instead whining around and in true Hi-Fidelity fashion, i'll give you my top 5 list of Valentine's Day songs:

1) Black Eye Peas - Where is the love?
2) James Ingram - Just Once
3) Dewa - Pupus
4) Rascal Flatts - Bless the Broken Roads
5) Nirvana - Seasons in the Sun

The CNY Posting

Whew, i have been eating and eating like mad since CNY (Thank God for the plentyful bounty). After this i must remember to exercise otherwise i'll end up looking like Jabba the Hut. Anyways, this CNY has been quite a low key affair as on the 3rd day when the usual 30 over odd friends go visiting my house as well as a few other homes were skipped due to us gambling overtime at the few houses we went. But all is good, i managed to get some time off from work to regenerate and refresh my energy and cells. I have spent good time with my family and though most of my hometown friends are busy its still great to hang out and catch up with them once in a while.

Its a great start to the Year of The Dog and i pray to the Lord for Him to keep continue His blessings to me and my family. Gong Xi ! Gong Xi!

Dreamtheater Rocks in Singapore!!!

Yeps...i have just gotten back from down south with my regular Singapore and Concert kaki Mr. Ong and made it for my family's CNY dinner. What can i say, Dreamtheater and Singapore rocks!!. Here are the highlights:

1) Upgraded our concert tickets from SGD 120 to SGD 150 at Kallang Indoor Staidum straight away when we reached Sgpore (we are kiasu to get infront of the stage and hopefully infront of John Petrucci).

2) We stayed in a cheap hotel at Geylang where you can get hookers legally. ( nope, we didnt)

3) Shop, Shop and Shop the whole two days till i'm broke.

4) Singapore girls are damn chio!! ( i like)

5) Somehow everyone thought we were Singaporeans. (damn)

6) Concert rocks!!! ( we were right infront of the stage and John Petrucci)

7) Deep in my heart, Singapore is like an alternate universe of how KL can be. ( its every Malaysian's dream that we can be like them someday hopefully)

8) Bloody JB taxi drivers charge us RM25 to get to Larkin Station from the Train Station.

9) Double Bonus in the bus. (kekeke)

10) Home Sweet Home

January Updates

Yea, i'm lazy and busy alltogether. You can definitely tell by how my blog is iregularly updated. But since we are in 2006, i guess i can try and fix things abit eh. Well, here's what happened so far:

Resolutions
Like a true champion, i achieved last year's resolution just days before 1st january. Its was just something i needed to say to someone and i did it after 4 years of procastination and nearly missed it after i set it as a new year resolution (yeah, i had to turn it to a resolution after 3 years to get it done). This year my resolution is to Get FIT! Its about time i trimmed down so i can fit my new clothes better (its more like i dun want to buy new sizes) and i believe from experience resolutions can be achieved at the very nick of time. So, do remember to ask "Why you still Fat??" whenever you meet to remind of my resolution.

Career
I am now a confirmed executive of Pharmaniaga Solutions, a Supply Chain Management Consultancy and recently i have been given more responsibilities in my portfolio which will augur well in my plans to climb the corporate ladder (i'm still on track to be a Tan Sri) . I also very much hope to get about RM 5 million worth of projects for this year. It aint easy but thats what i am hired for. Its gonna be a great year for my career! (with rants here and there)

Financials
With the year ending 2005, my financial standing is that i am in deficit (about RM 30, 000 in red) so i guess i will be working towards black.(just like Idris Jala of MAS only my number is far less than his)

Life
For 2005, i have done what i set out for and i am glad i did it. Sometimes the outcome is not what you expected or even wanted but the important thing is to keep the faith (God has His plans for us, so be patient). But i believe that you miss 100 percent the shots you didnt take so i just do it.For this year, i'm gonna be a bit more laid back and let things take its course. I've found my inspiration and I'm all fired up to acheive my dreams.

So thats the summary of what i think i'm gonna do this year. It aint gonna be rosy all year long though, so expect some bitching and ranting here and there (hope its not often). Be Blessed and Yosh!!

Happy New Year 2006!!

Yahoo!! its a new year again!! and i am still recovering from the party fatigue i had last nite. Had a great time at Ryan's wedding dinner where i did some catching up with some friends which i havent met for years. And after all that party, i still managed to catch some theater action today at the Actors Studio where Actorlympics was the show of the day. And to cap the day off was chilling out at Chilli's BSC with Joeboy, Terry and Kelvin. I guess with blurness, this is all i can write so far. All in all, the new year starts with a bang!

Congratulations to Ryan & Joanne!!

One of my best buds, Ryan is having his wedding today on New Year's Eve and what a great day to party!! All best wishes and may God bless you and Joanne always!! Congratulations!

Is the stars out of reach?

It is often said that we must reach for the stars but there are times that i think the stars may be out of reach. Theres not a lot of them on streets either but the not reaching what you aimed for aint the best feeling in the world. At work i am pressured to perform and the financial market out there aint looking that encouraging for me to convince clients that investing in IT is the thing to do to max their ROI. On a personal front things aint looking so rosy either. I felt like i got a cross to bear but sometimes during times like these i wish i can get someting for this pain. The bleeding of disappointements is indeed painful and I do wonder what will happen when it dries and theres no more to bleed. What will I become then? will the fabric of my being change? will I fall to the darkside which is always enticing me with glitter? or will i hold out my essence till my rescue? The only inspiration i can get into my mind is the trials of pain and suffering of another only son that was sent to deliver us all. I think its enough for me to go on through the tough times.I hope i hold out long enough.

A quiet Saturday slumber

Finally after a week long of hard work, its time to rest. Its rarely that i stayed home during weekends and thats been the case for the last 3 weeks. So today i decided that i am gonna recuperate at home watching a stack of DVDs that i havent watched. Oh yeah, the time of the year is also around the corner. I can already feel it in the air. Can you feel it too?

Been Burnin Purple Haze

Its almost one month since i posted anything here. I'm having a hectic schedule for the past weeks due to report writings and all. Till now I'm not having enough sleep and slowly i can feel myself being buggered by fatigue. I'm testing my human treshold time and again by doing this.Is it that i spend so much time for others i dont spend some for myself? Maybe, or perhaps its just part and parcel of life. I got so much to tell here but i'm just to stoned to bother. Remind me of what could have been in this space.

Planetshakers Conference 2006

Planet Shakers was birthed out of a vision that Russell Evans received from God, instructing him to start a youth conference that would change young people, and inspire them to make a difference in their world.

The Planet Shakers Conference began nine years ago with about 300 delegates. Since then, we have seen incredible growth with numbers doubling every year. It is held every year in January, seeing thousands come from all over Australia and different parts of the world.

In 2004, the conference was held in five venues over three weeks. Two weeks in Adelaide, our inaugural week in Perth at Challenge Stadium and two venues in the one week in Brisbane (at Garden City Christian Church and Citipoint COC). Up to 16,000 came along to the night-time meetings. The aim of the conference isn't to entertain but to facilitate a worship encounter with God. 2004 also saw the start of our own Planet Shakers Conference in Malaysia which had a significant impact on youth ministries and churches in all states.

The conference included Electives on Worship, University Outreach, Overseas Missions, Holy Spirit, High School Ministry, and Business & Leadership. The conference had a tremendous impact on the thousands of youth with a strong message to hear the cry of their generation and to respond with the message of Jesus.

DATE: 9-11 November 2006

VENUE: Grand Pyramid Convention Centre, Sunway Pyramid, Bandar Sunway

Find out more here

just a feeling

Nobody knows who I really am

I never felt this empty before

And if I ever need someone to come along,

Whos gonna comfort me, and keep me strong?

We are all rowing the boat of fate

The waves keep on coming and we cant escape

But if we ever get lost on our way

The waves would guide you through another day

Nobody knows who I really am

Maybe they just dont give a damn

But if I ever need someone to come along

I know you would follow me, and keep me strong

And every time I see your face

The ocean heaves up to my heart

You make me wanna strain at the oars,

and soon I can see the shore

I want you to know who I really am

I never thought I'd feel this way towards you

And if you ever need someone to come along,

I will follow you, and keep you strong

~just feelings inside me that needed to be let out~

all is good in the hood

well, to sum up the missing weeks:

"work-lepak-work-lepak- work- deepavali-lepak-aidilfitri-lepak-lepak -lepak-work"

...sounds like alot of fun eh....

In Penang!!

yeps..yeps...i'm blogging this while surfing at Starbucks Gurney Hotel! well, i have to come down here for work reasons and i'm gonna go back to KL tommorow.Sighs....good food, good life and also quite a cool rainy nite. Wish it could be like this every day.

Sheesh...

I am slightly slacking in the office these few days, dont know why or how. Its like i'm out-of-form and my goals are sluggishly achieved. I gotta pick up and buck up before it affects my performance. Sighs....

Congratulations to Mike Woon& Alicia Ng

Congrats to my colleague Mike and his wife Alicia on their wedding on the 8th of October 2005! Had a great time at the dinner last night as well as the karaoke session after dinner with the rest of the office. May God Bless Always, Cheers!