Gentleman, in modern culture the title has become to mean just about everyone, often used just as a polite form to address someone, in order not to offend. However it always seems to imply a certain degree of refinement in behavior and manners. The defining values have changed and keep changing as the society changes. For me the title has become to mean something pure, the ideal balance of zeitgeist and beauty of tradition.
How would you define a gentleman today? as opposed of the classic definition of "A gentleman is one, who without any title, bears a coat of arms, or whose ancestors have been freemen" . To what degree do you think it is something that should be manifested through someones style and taste, ones sartorial choices?
How important would conservative thinking and style be to a gentleman. Is it something that is inherited in his base values or would you consider it rather a restriction of appreciation for eccentricity?
For i believe eccentricity is something vital and personal, a kind of spark that seems to be apparent in many a noted gentleman of the past.
For me the definition of a modern gentleman will be best described by the beautiful quote by John Walter Wayland:
"The True Gentleman is the man whose conduct proceeds from good will and an acute sense of propriety, and whose self-control is equal to all emergencies; who does not make the poor man conscious of his poverty, the obscure man of his obscurity, or any man of his inferiority or deformity; who is himself humbled if necessity compels him to humble another; who does not flatter wealth, cringe before power, or boast of his own possessions or achievements; who speaks with frankness but always with sincerity and sympathy; whose deed follows his word; who thinks of the rights and feelings of others, rather than his own; and who appears well in any company, a man with whom honor is sacred and virtue safe."
If that is not enough to ponder, digest the words below and understand the appeal of it to the definition of being a modern gentleman.
IF
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!
--Rudyard Kipling
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